40th Anniversary Gift Ideas for Your Parents

Forty years is the ruby anniversary, and your parents have probably now spent more of their lives married than single. The best 40th anniversary gift for parents treats their story as something worth keeping, because by now it is a family history. Here are 11 ideas, from ruby jewelry to their wedding cake baked again. Our top pick is a song about their 40 years, so the story they tell at every holiday is saved in a form the grandchildren can play.

Listen to an example Songbond song

This one was made for another family. Yours would carry their names and your family's stories.

11 40th anniversary gift ideas for your parents

1. A song about their 40 years ($39.90). Gather the story from the family: how they met, the first house, the lean years and the good ones. Songbond turns it into an original song, ready within 24 hours.
2. Ruby jewelry. A ruby pendant or earrings, or a ring with a small ruby set into the band. $150 to $800.
3. A ruby-red enamel pot. A heavy cast-iron pot in deep red, for the Sunday stews they still cook. It will last another 40 years. $80 to $350.
4. Their wedding photos, restored. Prints from forty years ago fade and crack. A restoration service can bring back the color, and you can reprint them in new frames. $20 to $60 a photo.
5. A recorded conversation about how they met. Sit them down with a phone and ask the questions: the first date, the first fight, the proposal. Keep the recording for the family, and make copies for each sibling. Free.
6. A scenic train trip. A day or two by rail through mountains or along a coast, with dinner on board. No driving and no airports. $200 to $1,000.
7. A red rose bush for their garden. Plant it together on the day. It comes back every summer as a reminder. $30 to $80.
8. Their wedding cake, baked again. Show a baker the wedding photo and ask for a small copy of the top tier. $60 to $200.
9. The front page from their wedding day, framed. Newspaper archives can print the page from the morning they married. $30 to $70.
10. A tribute band playing the music they danced to. Find a local show covering the bands from their dating years and go with them. $60 to $200.
11. A memory book at the party. Instead of a guest book, ask every guest to write down one memory of the couple. $20 to $40.

How to choose for a 40th

At forty years, parents usually own everything they want. What they value is being known: their story heard and kept. Pick one gift that preserves the past and one that gives them a good day now. If several siblings are giving, one can take care of the keepsake and another can plan the outing.

• If they love telling stories: the recorded conversation, the restored photos or the song.
• If they still love to go out: the train trip or the tribute band.
• If they are homebodies: the enamel pot, the rose bush or the cake.

Asking your parents for their story without giving it away

Most of the best details for a 40th anniversary gift live in your parents' heads. You can get them out without spoiling the surprise. Ask during a normal visit, as simple curiosity: where did you go on your first date, what did Grandma think the first time you met. Look through the old albums together and photograph the backs of the prints, where the dates are written. Call an aunt or an old friend who was at the wedding. Write it all down the same day, before the details blur. Even small things, like the song on the car radio when he proposed, can become the best line in a toast or a song.

Make a song for their 40th

Create a ruby anniversary song for your parents from the stories you gather. It is ready within 24 hours, and express delivery gets it to you in about an hour.

Also in the Journal: songs for a 40th anniversary and anniversary songs for parents.