Christmas Gifts for Someone Who Lost Their Dad

Many dads were not big talkers. What they leave behind is things: a watch, a toolbox, a certain way of hanging the Christmas lights. The best Christmas gift for someone who lost their dad puts one of those things back to use, or makes room for him on the day. Our gentlest pick is his old watch, cleaned and running again, so one of the first things they open is something of his that works.

Listen to a song made in memory

This one was made for another family. Yours would carry his name and your stories.

11 Christmas gift ideas for someone grieving their dad

1. His watch, serviced and running. Take his old watch to a jeweler for a new battery, a clean and a fresh strap. Wearing it on Christmas morning keeps him close. $50 to $200.
2. A shadow box of his things. His fishing lure, his reading glasses, a ticket stub, his work badge. Arrange them in a deep frame with his name and years. $40 to $90.
3. The lights hung the way he did it. If he was the one on the ladder every December, go over and do it with them, in his order, with his old extension cords. It costs nothing and says more than a card.
4. His voice, saved for good. Old voicemails and videos get lost when phones are replaced. Help them copy every clip of his voice to a USB drive and a cloud folder. Free to $60.
5. A song in his memory ($39.90). You share his name, his sayings and the stories people tell at the table, and Songbond turns them into an original song. It gives the family something to play when nobody knows what to say.
6. A tree planted in his name. Give a young tree, or a card promising one for spring, to go in the yard or at a place he loved. $30 to $80.
7. His drink and two glasses. A bottle of whatever he poured at Christmas, with two good glasses for a toast in his name at dinner. $30 to $80.
8. His favorite album on vinyl. The record he played in the car or on Sunday mornings. Usually $25 to $40.
9. A day doing his thing. A round of golf, a morning fishing, a ball game in his team's colors. Go together and let the stories come. $40 to $150.
10. Old home movies turned digital. Send off the tapes and slides where he is behind the camera, or in front of it. A service costs $80 to $200 depending on how many there are.
11. His tools, cleaned and sorted. If they inherited his toolbox, spend an afternoon cleaning each tool and fitting them into a new case. It honors how he looked after things.

How to choose what fits

Start with what their time with him looked like. Some kids were his shadow in the garage. Others talked to him on the phone every Sunday. The gift should sit close to how they spent time together.

• If they are the one who worked beside him: the tools, the lights or the watch.
• If they are the family historian: the home movies, the saved voice or the shadow box.
• If they are not ready to talk about him: the album, the tree or a day doing his thing.

What goes into a song about Dad

From the stories people send us, the details that make a song land are small and specific. Words like loving and kind describe almost every father. What makes the song his is the phrase he said before every road trip, the whistle he used to call the kids in for dinner, or the way he checked the tire pressure twice. Before you order, ask the family to name three of those. They are the lines people remember.

If a song feels right

You can make a song in memory of their dad with his name and the stories that were his. It is ready within 24 hours, and express delivery takes about an hour if Christmas is close.

Also in the Journal: memorial songs for Dad and the first Christmas without a loved one.