Christmas Gift Ideas for Your Mother-in-Law

A mother-in-law is often the hardest name on the Christmas list. You know her, but not the way your spouse does, and you want the gift to say thank you without feeling forced. The best Christmas gifts for a mother-in-law honor what she does for the family: the dinners she hosts, the grandchildren she spoils, the person she raised. Our top pick is a song from you and your spouse together, because it thanks her in a way a scarf never could.

Listen to a Songbond song first

This one was made for another family. Yours would carry her name and your stories.

12 Christmas gift ideas for your mother-in-law

1. A song from both of you ($39.90). Your spouse shares the childhood stories, and you add what she has meant to you since. Songbond turns it into an original song, ready within 24 hours.
2. A serving platter for the meal she hosts. If she cooks the big dinner every year, give her something beautiful to carry it out on. Usually $40 to $120.
3. Then and now photos. Your spouse as a child next to your child at the same age, in one frame. Visitors always stop to compare the two faces. Usually $30 to $80.
4. A year of the grandchildren. A photo book of the kids' year, with a short line under each picture. Usually $40 to $80.
5. A good teapot and a tea sampler. For the mother-in-law who starts and ends the day with a cup. Usually $30 to $80.
6. You host this year. Offer to take Christmas dinner off her hands, or do the full cleanup after hers. For many mothers-in-law this is the gift they talk about all year.
7. Spring bulbs and good gardening gloves. If she gardens, bulbs planted now come up in April and remind her of you. Usually $25 to $60.
8. Theater tickets, with you. The Christmas show in town, with dinner beforehand. Usually $80 to $200.
9. A silk scarf. In a color she already wears, not the one you would choose. Usually $40 to $120.
10. The grandchildren's handprints as an ornament. Clay or salt dough, with their names and the year on the back. Usually $10 to $30.
11. A hand cream and bath set. The good kind she would never buy for herself. Usually $30 to $60.
12. A thank-you letter from you. A real letter, on paper, thanking her for the person she raised. Many mothers-in-law never hear it said. Keep it to one page and name one thing you admire about how your spouse was raised.

How to choose for your mother-in-law

Ask your spouse what she has mentioned lately, then ask what she would never buy for herself. The overlap is where the gift is. Keep it about her life now, not the life you imagine for her.

• If she hosts everything: the platter, hosting for her or the tea set.
• If she lives for the grandkids: the photo book, the handprints or the then and now frame.
• If you two are still getting close: the theater night, the letter or the song.

Make it from you, not only your spouse

Many people let their spouse pick the gift for their mother and just sign the card. She notices. Add one thing that is clearly yours. Write your own line in the card about something specific she did this year: the meals she brought after the baby came, the time she drove four hours to help you move. One real memory in your handwriting says more than love from both of us. If the two of you had a rocky start, this matters even more. A kind, specific line is hard to argue with, and it often softens things faster than an expensive gift ever could.

Make her song together

Create a song for your mother-in-law. Share your stories and her song is ready within 24 hours. There is no shipping and no cutoff, so express delivery gets it to you in about an hour.

Also in the Journal: birthday songs for mom and a personalized song as a Christmas gift.