Gift Ideas for Your Mother-in-Law

Buying for your mother-in-law is its own puzzle. You want to show you care, you do not want to overstep, and she may already own the thing you had in mind. The best gift for a mother-in-law shows that you see her as her own person, not just your spouse's mom. Here are 12 ideas for a birthday, Mother's Day or just because. Our honest top pick is a song about the family she started, because it thanks her for the person you married in a way a card cannot.

Listen to a song Songbond made

This one was made for another family. Yours would carry her name and your stories.

12 gift ideas for your mother-in-law

1. A song about the family she started ($39.90). Ask your spouse for childhood stories and add your own memories of her: the first dinner she cooked for you, the advice she gave on your wedding day. Songbond turns them into an original song, ready within 24 hours.
2. Lunch without your spouse. Just the two of you, somewhere she likes. It says you want to know her, not just visit her. Usually $30 to $60.
3. A lesson in her signature dish. Ask her to teach you the recipe your spouse grew up on. Free, and asking is a compliment in itself.
4. A good leather bag. A tote or crossbody she can use every day. Look at what she carries now and choose the same size in better leather. Usually $80 to $200.
5. An upgrade for her favorite hobby. Sharp pruning shears for the gardener, good needles for the knitter, a padded seat cushion for the bleachers. Usually $30 to $100.
6. The wedding photos she is in, printed. The couple's album is mostly the two of you. Pick every good photo of her from your wedding and print them in a small book. Usually $40 to $80.
7. A letter about the person she raised. Tell her three things you love about your spouse that you think came from her. Free, and she will keep it.
8. A day out for her and her best friend. Tickets to a show or a garden, plus lunch for two. Usually $60 to $150.
9. A birthstone necklace for her grandchildren. One small stone for each grandchild, on a simple chain she can wear with anything. Usually $60 to $200.
10. Her favorite coffee or tea, delivered monthly. Usually $20 to $40 a month, and it arrives long after the birthday is over.
11. The grandchildren's art, framed properly. Pick the best painting from each child and have it matted and framed. Usually $40 to $90.
12. Help with a job she mentioned. Painting the fence, clearing the gutters or sorting the garage. Free, and it shows you listened.

How to choose for your mother-in-law

Think about how well you know her and what she spends her time on. You do not have to get it exactly right. You have to show that you paid attention.

• If you are close: the lunch, the cooking lesson or the song.
• If you are still getting to know her: the leather bag, the coffee delivery or the day out with her friend.
• If she lives for the grandchildren: the framed art, the birthstone necklace or the wedding photos.

What to write in the card

A card from a son-in-law or daughter-in-law carries real weight, so keep it warm and specific. Thank her for one thing she did, not for everything. Mention a moment: the night she made up the guest bed for you, or the way she saved you a seat at your first family holiday. Avoid comparing her to your own mother, even kindly. Sign it from you, even if your spouse adds their name underneath. She will notice that you wrote it yourself.

Give her a song from both of you

Create a song for your mother-in-law. It is ready within 24 hours, and express delivery gets it to you in about an hour.

Also in the Journal: songs for the mother of the groom and anniversary songs for parents.