Sympathy Gift Ideas for the Loss of a Grandmother

When someone loses their grandmother, they lose the kitchen, the Sunday phone calls and the one person who thought everything they did was wonderful. A good sympathy gift for the loss of a grandmother brings a piece of her home with them. The 11 ideas below suit a grandchild, a friend or the parent who has just lost their mother, and most cost under $60. Our honest top pick is her handwritten recipe printed on a tea towel, because it gets used every week.

Hear a song one family made to remember someone

This one was made for another family. Yours would carry her name and your stories.

11 sympathy gift ideas for the loss of a grandmother

1. Her recipe on a tea towel. Scan the card in her handwriting, stains and all, and have it printed on a tea towel or a cutting board. Usually $30 to $70.
2. A cardinal ornament. There is an old saying that a cardinal at the window means a loved one is near. A glass cardinal for the tree or the kitchen window is usually $15 to $40.
3. Her quilt or afghan, cleaned and mended. The blanket she made by hand can be professionally cleaned and repaired so it lasts another fifty years. Usually $50 to $200.
4. A song about her. Share what the grandchildren called her, the smell of her kitchen and the phrase she said at every goodbye, and Songbond turns it into an original song ($39.90). A printed plaque of the song is available for the family room wall.
5. A photo of her young, restored. Find a picture from before she was anyone's grandmother, have it restored and framed. Usually $40 to $120 for both.
6. A candle in a teacup. A vintage teacup filled with a soy candle, the kind she might have used for afternoon tea. Usually $30 to $60.
7. Dinner on the day of the funeral. The family will be busy with guests and arrangements all day. A tray of food dropped off that evening, usually $50 to $100, is remembered long after.
8. A picture book for the little ones. A gentle children's book about losing a grandparent helps young grandchildren ask their questions. Usually $10 to $20.
9. Her sayings, framed. Collect the phrases she always used and print them together on one page for the hallway. Usually $30 to $60.
10. Cuttings from her plants. Her African violet, her spider plant, her Christmas cactus. Take cuttings and pot one for each grandchild. The pots cost $10 to $20 each.
11. A photographer at the family gathering. A funeral is often the only time the whole family is in one room. An hour of photos afterward, usually $150 to $400, gives everyone the family picture she would have wanted.

How to choose for the family

Think about where the person stood in her life. A grandchild in their twenties grieves differently from her own daughter, and a child of six differently again.

• If they are her grown grandchild: the tea towel, her sayings framed or the song.
• If they are her son or daughter: the restored photo, the mended quilt or the family photographer.
• If they are a young child: the picture book, or a cutting from her plants to look after.

Helping young grandchildren say goodbye

Small children often grieve in short bursts, sad one minute and playing the next. Give them something to do, not only something to hold: a plant from her home to water, a drawing to put in her casket, a photo of the two of them for the bedside table. Use plain words like died, not lost or sleeping, which can confuse them. And let them hear the grown-ups tell funny stories about her. It shows them that remembering Grandma can feel good.

A song for grandma

Create a memorial song for a grandmother. Tell us what the family called her and a few of her stories, and it is ready within 24 hours. If the service is soon, express delivery gets it to you in about an hour.

Also in the Journal: memorial songs for grandma and the first Christmas without a loved one.