Halfway To Eighty

Light the candles, call the fire department — baby's forty today. You groaned getting off the couch this morning, then checked your hair like it's '05, still quoting movies no one remembers, still winning me with that same line. Your knees crack louder than the campfire, your playlists stopped a decade back. But I've done the math, my love — and I like the numbers. You're halfway to eighty, baby — and I'd take the second half twice. Forty years of being you, the last twelve being mine. Blow 'em out, old man — make a wish. Mine already came true. Don't tell you I said it. You taught the kids your terrible dance moves, they think you hung the moon — same here. You grill one steak like it's a ceremony, burn it anyway — we cheer. The smell of charcoal, your dumb victory lap — I'd watch that show for forty more. I've done the math, my love — and I like the numbers. You're halfway to eighty, baby — and I'd take the second half twice. Forty years of being you, the last twelve being mine. Blow 'em out, old man — make a wish. Mine already came true. Don't tell you I said it. At eighty I'll still be in the front row laughing at the same three jokes. Deal's a deal — I checked the fine print. It says forever, give or take. You're halfway to eighty, baby — and I'd take the second half twice. Forty years of being you, the last twelve being mine. Blow 'em out, old man — make a wish. Mine already came true. Don't tell you I said it. Light the candles — all forty. Yeah, we're gonna need the hose.